Nourish

Labor Day. My partner and I had been fairly occupied with our work lately and had not been spending much time with the kids. So I promised them that while “dad” has to work today (don’t ask me – the service industry is, well, different), I would spend the day at home with them. Everyone is exhausted after an exciting Sunday of friends visiting, BBQ, and swimming in our wonderful neighbor’s pool. Though the kids didn’t get into the pool with us, they ran laps around the pool all the while when we’re enjoying the night sky and watching bats taking sips from the pool. They sure had their share of exercise yesterday!
 
So what did we do today? The boys took their naps most of the day and only briefly punctuated by potty breaks outside. No one whined and demanded treats or attention while I made jewelry on the dining table. Yup. Even I took a break from listening to Jeffrey Yuen’s lectures, looking up herbs or points, and I also decided to do the minimal amount of house chores for the day.
 
It’s been a long time since I picked up a pair of German long nose pliers or flush cutter and played with beads, softflex and clasps – color and texture. It actually felt awkward making the first few wire wrapping components, and not to mention the initial fear of this “something” turns out looking gaudy and ugly! I was amazed at myself for harboring such expectation and pessimism – isn’t it funny how “having fun” can be so difficult?! I *think* it might have to do with my parents and childhood development..
 
What if I just put that down and let myself play? What if it really doesn’t matter how the piece turn out (really!)? Letting oneself be, in this case, exploring with color, texture and small tools, is so healing and nourishing! There is a destination but it doesn’t matter! Showing up for the moment, ie. letting my intuition and curiosity steer, got me exactly where I needed to be. It doesn’t mean that every step along the way was perfect, or that one wouldn’t get stuck in the creative process. Finding a way around, or pass, or even meeting the “problem” head-on helps dissolve one’s sense of limitation. I guess, that is growth, isn’t it?
 
And the result can be so freeing (and pretty, too).
 
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